Ode to Kate

This morning Rebecca and I got the opportunity to go to Kate's class for a conference with the teacher (and Kate) and to view Kate's portfolio - all the pictures, projects she has worked on throughout the year. We are so proud of her! She then got to go out with Rebecca for a few hours alone as Lauren was in school (which rarely happens as whenever Lauren is in school, Kate is as well) and got a popsicle. You would think we were in Texas with the size of that thing! We love you Kate!

GERMany

We arrived in Germany on the 1st of August last year. The first 3 weeks we spent living in a hotel as we awaited the delivery of the furniture to our rented house. During that 3 weeks, we went from playground to playground, McDonalds to McDonalds, exploring cities. No one got sick. Since then, GERMany has taken its toll on the Molyneaux clan. Evidence below…This does not show all the hours spent filling out medical claim forms (as each doctor visit and prescription must have a claim form filled out and sent back to the US) nor the hours Rebecca has spent on the phone talking to the healthcare provider or reconciling what they should have paid to what was actually paid. Bless her heart…it has taken at least 5 hours a week since September to keep it all straight!

August 25 - Lauren - Bronchitis
September 1 - Lauren - Lung congestion
September 4 - Rebecca - family exposed to TB on plane, needed testing
September 5 - Kate - strep throat
September 5 - Lauren - strep throat
September 11 - Kate - test for TB exposure
September 11 - Lauren - test for TB exposure
September 15 - Kate - health test
September 15 - Lauren - nasal congestion
September 20 - Lauren - sinus and cough not improving
September 23 - Rebecca - kidney and bladder infection - ambulance and hospital for 2 days
October 1 - Kate - strep throat
October 1 - Lauren - sinus infection
October 3 - Lauren - hand, foot and mouth disease at Disney
October 9 - Lauren - sinus infection
October 20 - Kate - fever
October 28 - Kate - ankle injury
November 20 - Lauren - Upper Respiratory infection in Austria
November 27 - Kate - ear infection
November 27 - Lauren - Pneumonia
December 5 - Lauren - urinary tract infection
December 6 - Lauren - pneumonia
December 22 - Lauren - severe cough
December 22 - Kate - pink eye/conjunctivitis
December 31 - Kate - pink eye, severe cough
December 31 - Lauren - pink eye
January 1 - Miles - bronchitis
January 7 - Rebecca - sore throat/cough
January 14 - Miles - pneumonia
January 25 - Rebecca - broken foot
February 3 - Kate - Cold/severe milk anaphylactic reaction
February 3 - Lauren - cold
February 10 - Rebecca - broken hand
February 10 - Lauren - foot infection
February 16 - Lauren - Scarlett Fever

Fun Christmas Ideas

When my mom came over a few weeks ago, she brought with her a box containing the "Elf on a Shelf." In the box was a stuffed toy Christmas elf and a book. The book is to be read to children to explain who the elf is and why he is there. Essentially, the book is a cute story that tells the kids that the elf watches over them in the Christmas season and reports back to Santa each night whether the kids have been bad or good. The next morning, the kids would discover the elf had returned from the North Pole and was hiding on a different shelf or place in the house to watch them. While not only serving as perhaps extra incentive to be on their best behavior, it provides fun as they race out of their beds to try and find the elf each morning. They are not allowed to touch him (just talk to him) and he (obviously) does not reply. And it is up to your family to give him a name. A very cute, entertaining idea for the little ones and a fun tradition. The link and story of his origin - http://www.elfontheshelf.com/#/home.

Castles

Ever since Kate went to Disney in February (and EuroDisney in October) she has been obsessed with princesses. So what better place to take her than a country that has hundreds of castles, some in ruins and some upkept? Most weekends, we make at least one trip to a local castle. There are 5 within 15 minutes of our house. Each week we venture a bit further. Here are a few pics from the castles near us. However, I am getting quite tired of fielding the question of "Where are all the prince, princesses, kings and queens?" I fight the urge to just say, "THEY ARE DEAD. THEY EXIST NO MORE." However, that might be a little scarring...

Speaking of scaring, our neighbors had a kitchen fire the other night and right as Rebecca and the kids got home, the fire department arrived, many trucks, many hoses. The kids were a bit intimidated, but now Kate woke up 3 times last night screaming and a sweaty mess from dreams about fires. Just wonderful...

Halloween

Halloween is not a holiday in Germany, though over the past 10 years or so, Germans have come to embrace it. However, the concept of going door to door trick-or-treating is still new and not common. A few kids come to the door, some locals and some expats, but more of the Germans tend to attend parties or haunted houses. As Rebecca is a member of the American Women's Club, we had a list of American households that were giving out candy and drove around to them. 8 houses in an hour and a half was rather tough with the kids getting in and out of the car.

However, Kate's school offers something called Trunk or Treat. People drive their cars into the big school parking lot, all park facing the same direction and open their trunks and decorate them. Kids then go in their costumes from trunk to trunk and people give out candy. And it is amazing how well people decorate their trunks. Smoke machines, coffins, crazy stuff. I had a blast and the kids did too. It is entirely light out so you can see the costumes and nothing is too scary. There is a parade at the end with all the kids and prizes given out for best costumes, scariest, etc. A fantastic idea and a great work around to not being able to go door to door. See some good pics below!

Parenting

So Rebecca and I are not strict parents when it comes to discipline but have always been quite strict when it comes to adhering to schedules for the girls. Meals are eaten at the same time every day within 15 minutes and bed time never waivers. The girls have always gone down at 7 (or earlier) and I can count on one hand the number of times that has not happened, usually because we are traveling or a dinner out runs late. Kate gets her 12 hours and Lauren gets her 14 (with an afternoon nap) as recommended by the APA. We both believe this helps, as the kids always know what to expect and when to expect it. I am always interested to watch the kids of other parents who don't adhere to such a schedule. In my opinion, I tend to witness more mood swings and melt downs. But this may just be a predetermined bias. This all essentially stems from Rebecca's unwavering adherence to the rules. If the APA recommends it, she does it. No TV before two as it contributes to ADD. Sleep schedules, everything.

So the reason I write this now is that I am sitting in the rotunda of the Disneyland Hotel in Paris because this is the only place in the hotel that has wifi. Rebecca and the girls went to bed about 7 and I came up here to catch up on email and baseball playoffs. And I found an absolute mad house...50 kids or so running absolutely amok, dressed from just diapers to full princess and pirate regalia. Parents are sitting here drinking, kids are shrieking, chasing each other with star wars guns and at least one gets injured every 5 minutes, several are absolutely screaming bloody murder and melting down at their parents feet. All from age 1 to 10. At 8 o'clock I wasn't too surprised. But now its 9:30 and no signs of slowing. And I know these are the same kids that are going to be up at 7 and in the park, knocking my kids over in line and behaving horrendously. Do parents know this and just choose to have their fun at the expense of the kids? Or do they just assume kids know when they need to go to bed and its ok to keep them out like this? Or, is this just Disney and vacation and these parents act quite differently at home? Or am I just a square who should let his kids run amok too as they are missing out by not doing so?

Dual Responsibilities of a Parent

The PRIMARY job of a parent is to take care of their kids, shield them from pain, both emotionally and physically. The minute that child is born, there is no greater responsibility than shaping that child to grow into a caring, self-supporting and responsible adult, capable of raising their own family and making a contribution to society.

Reading the newspaper over the past week has brought tears to my eyes several times. Reading about the Israeli girl who was abused and killed by her grandfather, the woman who carried her boy's dead body in her car for several months and the NY woman who let the stepfather of her daughter beat and leave her for dead has just infuriated me. I could never raise a had to my children, nor can I stand it when I see them hurt physically or emotionally. I commented to a friend the other day that seeing the hurt look in my 20 month old's eyes when she says hello to someone and they don't respond is awful. And I don't understand how someone could ever hurt their (or anybody's) children. There is so much pain caused in kids that is preventable. I want to shield my children from every possible bad thing that could ever befall them - physical or emotional. I want to take them away to some deserted island where no one could possibly hurt them.

However, it would be irresponsible of me to do so as it is my role as a parent to help prepare my children for the hurtful (and good) things in life and help them minimize the opportunity for something bad to happen to them. Taking them away and not teaching them about these things would just increase the chances that they do get hurt when they are away from my watchful eye. The dichotomy of trying to protect my kids and letting them experience the real world as well is a role I struggle with. How much do you let them see and when? Do you watch a bit removed to see how they react to things and then swoop in when they are closer to the line of getting hurt? Or do you let them get hurt (a little of course!) to experience and realize certain dangers?

And it is one thing when we as parents know of the dangers and try to keep our kids from getting hurt - hot stoves, mean kids on a playground, streets. But my heart goes out to these parents in China who were only trying to feed their children and eating food of the shelves in grocery stores, who now have kids in intensive care with kidney stones or worse. The failure that I imagine you would feel as a parent would be oppressive, but it is a failure that could not be avoided. What were they supposed to do? Pull out their home chemistry set and test everything in the grocery store? So incredibly sad that so many parents are now placed in such a situation.

Kids are so helpless and don't understand danger and cruelty. Yet they are faced with it every day in this world. I feel so incredibly grateful that my kids are some of the lucky ones who have parents (primarliy their mother) that are so diligent and observant and are with them constantly protecting them from this cruel world. I just wish all kids could be so lucky...